Writing a eulogy for a friend or loved one can be very difficult, I wanted to share the one I wrote for my dad, it was extremely difficult, but to make it start flowing I thought of all the good times. my 1st bit of advice is to add some bits to make people smile, for example, one of my old school friends who passed away loved cheese, so lots of the mourners who came up to speak made reference to his favorite food, and it's nice to think that he's up there somewhere enjoying a piece of Wensleydale, happy and healthy, and DJing or making music, if you can think of your loved ones favorite things, what made that person who they are, this is the best place to start.
so below here I have provided my dad's eulogy, feel free to interpret it to suit who you are writing for
:)
Eulogy speech for Dad
Thank-you all from the bottom of my heart for just being here today. I know a lot of you have travelled from very far just to show your support. It is wonderful to be surrounded by your love and respect for my dad and for showing he holds a special place in your heart. It was once written that the value of a persons life is directly related to the number of people they positively affect. Thank-you for all the calls, texts, and cards I have received. I wish to acknowledge the amazing doctors, nurses, and medical staff that cared for him, with all his medical treatments, right up until his time of passing. I appreciate you all more than you will ever truely know.
When I began to write this, I was rather terrified about how do you begin to thank someone who's first gift to you was your very existance? what do I say? As many of you may, know, I was born on his birthday so just from that one fact you will understand how special a bond we had. So, then it came natrually, I could begin to tell you tonnes of stories about dads life, about the landmarks he painted and decorated, his funny rugby stories and songs, but this is what I came up with, i loved being dads daughter. You all knew him as different names, Dai, Dad, Grandad, Dave, David (he prefered Dave always of course but underderstood that it was more formal and people were being polite) also, as a brother or a friend or fellow patient, simply put... to a lot of us, a hero. When I asked people to describe him, I have heard people say 'funniest man I have ever met' 'such a great man' 'life and soul of the party' and 'full of fun' .
He taught me some great valuable lessons, how to grow veg, to study and do your best and work hard, how to weed the garden, how to soak someone in the face with a garden hose, and some excellent wrestling moves! At the risk of sounding cliche, he was one of the greatest men you will of ever known, very down to earth, and such respect of people, regardless of age, race, or background, he immediatly saw the best in you. Spending a large amount of time with him in hospital, we talked about an array of topics. I cherish the time I spent with him and I am sure you all did too. I got to know him in a more meaningful way than before. Even after the chemo he had, he did not really loose much hair, and despite how ill he was, he did not have a single wrinkle on his face, and never forgot how to smile and laugh.
He made me laugh with random comments, we would be in bulk laughing!
He loved jelly and ice cream, infact, I can imagine him saying 'hey Jesus, when is the jelly and ice cream being served, and a nice coffee!'
He loved his sweets and especially Bounty bars. He loved carrot and turnip mash, and for breakfast he loved a massive bowl of cornflakes with the milk right up to the top, he also loved soup, and also sometimes, egg on toast. Seeing him savour food was a pleasure, because over the last few years, his appetite decreased more and more.
He loved the American pawn shop show on the TV and wanted to go and meet the stars off one of the shows, he had an ambition to go to Las Vegas he was only telling me just a month before he passed. He loved crocodile dundee, only fools and horses, and cowboy movies.
His sense of humour taught me not to take life too serously, this is one of the best lessons he passed down to me. Life is way too short to let anyone or anything make you unhappy. He never, ever lost his sense of humour, He seldom complained or asked why me about his illnesses, he never let cancer beat him. It does not suprise me he never had a single moment of self pity, His courage throughout his fight was incredible. We should all wish for one-tenth of the courage and strenght he had.
I have not quite come to terms with the fact that I will never have another conversation with my father again. I am sure that I share that with many of you. I hope everyone can make his memory live on in the way of being a good person, do not hate anyone and just be happy! The world was a better place because my Dad, Dave, Dai or however you know him, lived in it for 75 years. Thank-you dad for making me want to make the world a better place, we were lucky to have you in our lives. I will miss your wonderful Welsh accent with that slight Scouse twang, I will miss the way you sing the Welsh national anthem and O guide me thou great redeemer with such pride and loud and proud. that is why I picked these tracks in memory of you today. I love you dad and I always will and I loved being your daughter, sleep well in peace with no more pain and illness. Thank-you xxx
I hope that gives you some inspiration as to what to write, I put his favorite films, hobbies, TV programmes, his quirks, favorite food. When people say they can they help in any way, if they knew the person you are writing about, see if they have any memories or stories about them, they can be great to add to your eulogy too. The number one thing to not do is say negative things. When I was writing my mothers eulogy, I openly admit it was extremely difficult to write as it was a very difficult relationship, I talk about this mother daughter relationship in my blogs as I am sure there are others who have been through similar, and the reason I write about the things I do is to offer some comfort and help, if it helps at least one person, I know I have done the right thing. So, when you have had a difficult relationship with someone you are writing a eulogy about, try to turn a negative into a positive, for instance, my mother was very stubborn, this can be taken in a light-hearted way, as it can be said that her determination was admirable. I have recently watched a series on Netflix called Everything sucks, it was about growing up in the 80's and had a wonderful cast in it, and one of the lines in it is about how we can be an enemy in one persons story and to someone else an hero in theirs, or something like that! I know personally, to some people I'm not favorable, and I'm OK with that, not everyone is going to take a shine to me, and not everyone is going to like the same programmes as me, and with some people I can clash, it's fine and not a bad thing. A lot of people remember my mother very fondly, so I wrote her Eulogy from my best memories of her, if you really can't find anything at all, i advise to find a few poems, google is a great place to find the perfect one, should you need any help, do comment below and I will try my very best to help in your time of need, or just to talk, it's great to let it out, it could be the start of you writing your own blogs too!
On the actual day of the funeral, cremation or remembrance, if you get stuck, or too upset, someone else can come up to help you read it, you do not have to feel any pressure that you have to do it or have failed if you can't do it, it's a very difficult, emotional and sad time, and you are grieving, I still am after 4 months of loosing my dad and just under a year after loosing my mother, there's no time limit to how long it takes.
When reading, take long deep breaths, and if you feel you are starting to get upset and tears are starting to form, my tip is to squeeze your thumbs together, it's kind of comforting in a way, have a drink of water, I don't really recommend lots of alcohol before, maybe a wee tot to calm nerves. Again, if it gets way too much and you find you cannot read anymore, someone else will take over, the reverend who did a lovely service for my dad offered to read for me if I was going to get too upset, so there's plenty of support around you on the day.
I do hope this blog has offered you help and support in writing a eulogy, don't forget to put in a funny story, it's OK to laugh when celebrating someones life, what you write will heal whoever is there on the day, and can be a great healer for yourself too, good luck and heal well. Netty x
so below here I have provided my dad's eulogy, feel free to interpret it to suit who you are writing for
:)
Eulogy speech for Dad
Thank-you all from the bottom of my heart for just being here today. I know a lot of you have travelled from very far just to show your support. It is wonderful to be surrounded by your love and respect for my dad and for showing he holds a special place in your heart. It was once written that the value of a persons life is directly related to the number of people they positively affect. Thank-you for all the calls, texts, and cards I have received. I wish to acknowledge the amazing doctors, nurses, and medical staff that cared for him, with all his medical treatments, right up until his time of passing. I appreciate you all more than you will ever truely know.
When I began to write this, I was rather terrified about how do you begin to thank someone who's first gift to you was your very existance? what do I say? As many of you may, know, I was born on his birthday so just from that one fact you will understand how special a bond we had. So, then it came natrually, I could begin to tell you tonnes of stories about dads life, about the landmarks he painted and decorated, his funny rugby stories and songs, but this is what I came up with, i loved being dads daughter. You all knew him as different names, Dai, Dad, Grandad, Dave, David (he prefered Dave always of course but underderstood that it was more formal and people were being polite) also, as a brother or a friend or fellow patient, simply put... to a lot of us, a hero. When I asked people to describe him, I have heard people say 'funniest man I have ever met' 'such a great man' 'life and soul of the party' and 'full of fun' .
He taught me some great valuable lessons, how to grow veg, to study and do your best and work hard, how to weed the garden, how to soak someone in the face with a garden hose, and some excellent wrestling moves! At the risk of sounding cliche, he was one of the greatest men you will of ever known, very down to earth, and such respect of people, regardless of age, race, or background, he immediatly saw the best in you. Spending a large amount of time with him in hospital, we talked about an array of topics. I cherish the time I spent with him and I am sure you all did too. I got to know him in a more meaningful way than before. Even after the chemo he had, he did not really loose much hair, and despite how ill he was, he did not have a single wrinkle on his face, and never forgot how to smile and laugh.
He made me laugh with random comments, we would be in bulk laughing!
He loved jelly and ice cream, infact, I can imagine him saying 'hey Jesus, when is the jelly and ice cream being served, and a nice coffee!'
He loved his sweets and especially Bounty bars. He loved carrot and turnip mash, and for breakfast he loved a massive bowl of cornflakes with the milk right up to the top, he also loved soup, and also sometimes, egg on toast. Seeing him savour food was a pleasure, because over the last few years, his appetite decreased more and more.
He loved the American pawn shop show on the TV and wanted to go and meet the stars off one of the shows, he had an ambition to go to Las Vegas he was only telling me just a month before he passed. He loved crocodile dundee, only fools and horses, and cowboy movies.
His sense of humour taught me not to take life too serously, this is one of the best lessons he passed down to me. Life is way too short to let anyone or anything make you unhappy. He never, ever lost his sense of humour, He seldom complained or asked why me about his illnesses, he never let cancer beat him. It does not suprise me he never had a single moment of self pity, His courage throughout his fight was incredible. We should all wish for one-tenth of the courage and strenght he had.
I have not quite come to terms with the fact that I will never have another conversation with my father again. I am sure that I share that with many of you. I hope everyone can make his memory live on in the way of being a good person, do not hate anyone and just be happy! The world was a better place because my Dad, Dave, Dai or however you know him, lived in it for 75 years. Thank-you dad for making me want to make the world a better place, we were lucky to have you in our lives. I will miss your wonderful Welsh accent with that slight Scouse twang, I will miss the way you sing the Welsh national anthem and O guide me thou great redeemer with such pride and loud and proud. that is why I picked these tracks in memory of you today. I love you dad and I always will and I loved being your daughter, sleep well in peace with no more pain and illness. Thank-you xxx
I hope that gives you some inspiration as to what to write, I put his favorite films, hobbies, TV programmes, his quirks, favorite food. When people say they can they help in any way, if they knew the person you are writing about, see if they have any memories or stories about them, they can be great to add to your eulogy too. The number one thing to not do is say negative things. When I was writing my mothers eulogy, I openly admit it was extremely difficult to write as it was a very difficult relationship, I talk about this mother daughter relationship in my blogs as I am sure there are others who have been through similar, and the reason I write about the things I do is to offer some comfort and help, if it helps at least one person, I know I have done the right thing. So, when you have had a difficult relationship with someone you are writing a eulogy about, try to turn a negative into a positive, for instance, my mother was very stubborn, this can be taken in a light-hearted way, as it can be said that her determination was admirable. I have recently watched a series on Netflix called Everything sucks, it was about growing up in the 80's and had a wonderful cast in it, and one of the lines in it is about how we can be an enemy in one persons story and to someone else an hero in theirs, or something like that! I know personally, to some people I'm not favorable, and I'm OK with that, not everyone is going to take a shine to me, and not everyone is going to like the same programmes as me, and with some people I can clash, it's fine and not a bad thing. A lot of people remember my mother very fondly, so I wrote her Eulogy from my best memories of her, if you really can't find anything at all, i advise to find a few poems, google is a great place to find the perfect one, should you need any help, do comment below and I will try my very best to help in your time of need, or just to talk, it's great to let it out, it could be the start of you writing your own blogs too!
On the actual day of the funeral, cremation or remembrance, if you get stuck, or too upset, someone else can come up to help you read it, you do not have to feel any pressure that you have to do it or have failed if you can't do it, it's a very difficult, emotional and sad time, and you are grieving, I still am after 4 months of loosing my dad and just under a year after loosing my mother, there's no time limit to how long it takes.
When reading, take long deep breaths, and if you feel you are starting to get upset and tears are starting to form, my tip is to squeeze your thumbs together, it's kind of comforting in a way, have a drink of water, I don't really recommend lots of alcohol before, maybe a wee tot to calm nerves. Again, if it gets way too much and you find you cannot read anymore, someone else will take over, the reverend who did a lovely service for my dad offered to read for me if I was going to get too upset, so there's plenty of support around you on the day.
I do hope this blog has offered you help and support in writing a eulogy, don't forget to put in a funny story, it's OK to laugh when celebrating someones life, what you write will heal whoever is there on the day, and can be a great healer for yourself too, good luck and heal well. Netty x
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